July 2009
14 posts
Hello everyone.
Yes.. I kind of just now got to a few entries. I’m sorry =(. I know quite a few are long but I’m not one to limit feelings..
LTY
46. Dear J,
You haven’t made an effort to talk to me in 10 days. This never happens. I’m really worried that you forgot about me. Maybe its just summer and your busy & im just paranoid, but I can’t help but think this. I know that between you and me there is only lust. But I want more. I want you to like me. I want you to love me. I want you to get an outrageous burst of butterflies in...
45. To my five year old self,
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to turn out like this, I tried to stick to your ideas. I still have your drawings etched on my heart. Love, Your nineteen year old self.
44. Dear J,
I’m so tired of pretending that I don’t care because the truth is that I DO care. I care when you don’t give me hugs in the morning, or when you just don’t say hi when you see me. I care when you don’t text me for days straight, or if you take more then 60 seconds to answer a message from me. My heart can’t help but flutter when you tell me that you love me,...
43. dear rachell,
i once found you endearing, but then i realized what an incomplete, sad, obnoxious, lonely girl you are. there is nothing appealing about you, and i no longer wish to have you in my life. i would say that i wished the best for you, but i’d really only like for you to die painfully in a fire with an anal fistula. perhaps you don’t even deserve that. either way, i’m sure that you...
42. hello again,
i hate the fact that you hurt me, yet i still am under the spell. i told everyone you weren’t worth getting hurt over. but i lied. how could i not have been hurt when i liked you more than i ever even let you know. as much i want to be over you, i just cant. this sucks and i feel like a weak dumbass. i want to believe that you still care, if even a little, but i’m only making it worse...
41.
if this is the masterpiece patience holds, then i want no part of it. i said i’m giving you my heart, standing on these stilts, and you’ll have nothing to do with it. i can’t scream loud enough for you to hear because the phones don’t work. i can’t apologize for lack of knowing what still hurts. this is wrong. you know we’re getting nowhere fast.you know...
40. What if I wrote down all my thoughts?
What if I wrote down all my thoughts? Like everything, absolutely everything that came in my head. Could I do that? Would anyone care? Of course Crystal—>that’s my extreme faux self confidence. My outside appearance is starting to…now I have to fake being asleep to keep from being found out. This could be dangerous—>key to my soul in essence. How fast my mind jumps...
38. Dear not dear at all boy,
This is how you will always remain in my heart, a bitter, selfish, undeserving boy. I’ve cried my heart out for you, multiple times I’ve cried until I cannot feel pain anymore. I’ve hurt myself because of you, and lied because of you. I’ve believed false things because of you, and I have never felt more angry at someone then I feel at you. It seems I cannot release you...
39.
I’ve always told people that I’m a night person, and it’s true. I never truly begin to function before 3 p.m., and even then it is questionable. I mean, why would anyone prefer day over night? Sure, there is the sun, but other then that, why bother? Night is so quiet, peaceful, serene (crap, I am sounding like a thesaurus now). But, you can actually get time where your cell phone isn’t...
37. Dear you
You said really wanted to be happy and knew that I wanted to be happy too. I do want to be happy; I want to be happy with you. You make me happy. I just don’t know if you want to be happy with me or if I even make you happy.
36. My one and only love,
You made me go bi, and it is 100% AGAINST my religion. And I hate it because i feel ashamed going to church & youth. But no matter how much you’ve hurt me, i can’t seem to ever let you go.
35. Dear Taylor,
I know I was an asshole when it came to our break up. I never explained why I did the things I did, or said the things I said. To tell you the truth, I don’t even know what my motivations were. But I do know one thing: I’m sorry. xo, Me
34. Dear friends,
I feel like, out of all of the people we have in our ‘group’, I’m the one that you like the least. I know one of you has called me out before because I “freak out” if I don’t get invited anywhere or something, but a) I don’t freak out and b) if I didn’t SAY something, you never would. You guys tell me that you love me and that I’m your friend,...
June 2009
34 posts
33. Dearest ex babe,
I fell helplessly & unconditionally in love with you. & just tell me why you ripped my heart out & threw it away like it was some old Polaroid photo. i felt pathetic obsessing over you. I still do. and you’re the reason why i swing both ways. and if it wasn’t for you, maybe my life wouldn’t be so effed up. xoxo rs
32. dear you,
hi there. i think i kind of maybe like you. a lot. which is sort of a problem, for a number of reasons. A) you’re a freshman, and i’m a recently graduated senior. you’re also the best friend of my best friend’s younger brother. which makes things extra complicated. because, if you were just some random freshman, my friends would just think i’m weird and shun me...
31. Dear E,
I don’t know if you’ve realised this but I’m in love with you. Next to you, I feel invisible and yet, I still want you. I haven’t told anyone the way I feel about you because I’m afraid they’ll laugh at me. I’m afraid that they’ll also despise me. I love you for all the wrong reasons but does it matter? Truth is, you make me feel like shit. And yet,...
30. Dear SMF,
I miss you so much, dude. How pathetic, right? Since we’re not even dating. But I wanna see you, hug you hi and goodbye, laugh at all your jokes, and forget about the whole world. Having your arm kiddingly around me, smiling at me as a joke, and flirting with me just because. I miss that. Really bad. With much love, Me.
29. M:
I seriously think we need a safe enviroment where we can get rid of the sexual tension we’ve created. It’s driving me insane, no matter how much i try to not think about it. Oh lord, i. Want. You.
28. Dear You,
Tell me what the hell is going on in your mind. I know I should hate you for what you’ve done to me, but I can’t find it in my heart to. Every time I see you, I don’t know how I should act. I think of the potential we had. Even if it was just to become friends again. I sometimes find myself wanting to come up to you and just start up one of those random conversations we used to have, but I can’t...
27. Dear MC,
To be completely honest, and I mean really honest: It doesn’t matter. Not in any way, shape or form. Be mad, be sad, be furious, be guilty, be nonchalant, be happy. I don’t care. Think all you want, analyze the situation, or do nothing at all; I won’t be affected. I refuse to be. I’m glad I’ve been replaced, I’m glad it was so very easy for you. I guess I was...
dear lettrestoyou, please edit. thanks.
—-
Why would I edit what someone has written. That’s limiting their expression of written work and I can’t edit what is needed or not needed. I’m sorry. No one is forcing you to follow.
26. Dear Me,
Somewhere in life’s littorals, being’s beachhead and elan’s intertidals, there comes a time where you must draw a line. You look around you and you look at yourself, you look upon that tumbling surf and its hypnotic grazing of the sand, the way that the waves waver but nevertheless keep on sweeping away. You stare at your reflection in those oscillating waters and you vision your...
25.
First of all, Fuck you. Make up your mind about shit, girl. I love you so much, friend, but you need to decide who you want in your life and who you don’t. Now you’re saying that this asshole who basically only befriended you because of some “connections” and then turned around and left you wants to be your friend again. You’ve given him too many chances and...
24.
M’kay. Firstly: I’m so, so sorry. Really, I am. You are an amazing person. And I never thought I would be the person that I am at the moment. I haven’t done this before, so I have no track-record to fall back on as a blame-mechanism. I’m just an asshole. I suck. Real, real bad. And the hurt it will cause you is crushing. But not crushing enough to make me stop. The thing...
23.
I secretly wish that you would cheat on your girlfriend with me. So we could just get rid of the obvious sexual tension that surrounds the air everytime we are near.
22. Dear L,
You need to realize that the world does not revolve around you. Everyone has tried to talk to you about your “holier than thou” attitude, and you just turn around and blow it back in our faces and start calling us out on our flaws that have nothing to do with the situation. If somebody tries to talk to you, you never listen. Maybe people wouldn’t feel the hatred I felt toward...
21.
She told me that I was in love with you. I told her I wasn’t, but I really think I may be. If it’s that obvious to her, I wonder if it’s that obvious to you. This is pointless. You have a girlfriend you love and I’m just the friend… the one dreaming about you, thinking about you every damn minute of the day, hoping you’ll call just to talk about nothing in...
20. Grandma,
I really wish that sometimes you would listen to the things you say. When you tell my mom that she’s fat, or tell me I’m the accident of this family. I wish you could understand what it feels like to have to sit and be guilt tripped into doing everything that pleases you and nobody else. I wish I could take a recorder and play it back to you. But I don’t think that it would...
19. dear my best friend everrrr,
i don’t know why i’m feeling this way but i feel like i’m starting to like you as a lot more than a best friend. but i don’t want a relationship with you. i don’t like that idea. i just have been thinking about you a lot more lately, and i don’t know what it is. i don’t want to be thinking these things. i can’t tell anyone how i feel about you...
18. Dear K,
It’s hard for me to tell you this and it’s harder for me to write this out for everyone to see, but even with the many times I tell you that I don’t love you you still persist to have feelings for me. I tell you to go away and there you are, still in love. You’ve teased me with your kisses. You’ve driven me crazy with your touch. The more you tell me you love me, the...
17. Dear You,
You’re my dream come true. I haven’t been this legitimately happy this many days in a row ever before. The way my head fits perfectly on your shoulder. The way every kiss is like two puzzle pieces fitting together. The way you hold me any chance you get, but give me my space when you know I want it. You let me nibble your fingers when I’m scared(: I love your voice. I could...
16. dear boy,
don’t you understand? please, just tell me you understand, just realize that we’ll never be together. please, just do it. it’s becoming painful to know that you’re still hopeful. - that girl who doesn’t even like you as a friend.
15.
I have cancer and you’re too selfish to ask me if I’m all right. Who cares if I told a few people you were gay? I’ve learned my lesson. Please talk to me.
14.
To tell you how much you may have hurt my feelings would be too easy. To tell you how much it scarred me for life is a novel that could never end.
13.
i know you love me, but your cold nature confuses me a lot.
12.
And IIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIeeeeIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIeeIIIIIIIIIIIIIII will always loooove yoooouuu.
11.
you confuse me.
10.
I really think I’m ugly, all my friends are pretty and they all are gonna be successful
9. dear cat kidd,
i hate it that you kept on talking about alot of girls that you just met in indonesia. didnt you know that i was hurting? i always tell you that you matter so much to me, even more than a friend. but i dont know anymore. i hope you’d soon realize to stop looking for love. im here waiting. -jellyfish kidd
8. Dear lover,
You drink too much, you smoke too much, I get jealous when you tell me all about your day, and all the guys you go about with. I haven’t been depressed for a while, well now that’s changed. I really have no reason for it, just my realization of my shitty life. I’ve discovered I’m a masochist, and I think I’m way too pussy to go through with suicide. Yours Truly,...
7.
I wish I could have went tonight, but its okay. Since you’re going to record it for me. And there are many more of your events to come. I just like the feeling that your chick wasn’t invited, since you didn’t want her to come. And just me and your guy best friend were.
6.
I hate how we fight every day over pointless things that make no sense. we broke up - that doesnt mean you get to stomp on me every chance you get just to take out all your hurt. you make up things in your head to get mad at me over, and insist they are true when they aren’t. you start fights over assumptions . and every single time i am the one apologizing- over pointless or non existent...
5.
i think i’m falling for you, but something keeps changing my mind. i don’t want to be in a relationship with you at all. why do i keep thinking and dreaming about you? i hate how i can’t tell anyone how i’m feeling because i know nobody would approve of it. and i don’t want things to change if i told you. i don’t know what you would do if i told you. i just want...
4. Love of my life,
I am so sorry that I have put you through all of this bullshit. You have gone through so much grief and frustration because of my bigot father. The truth is, although you were the reason my unhappiness began, you were the only one who could save me from it. You bring me so much joy. I love you with all of my heart. I have never felt so much for one person before. Being in love really is as great...
3.
i used to have this friend, she had her flaws like any other human being, but i always overlooked them, trying to see the natural beauty instead. our friendship ended badly, to put it short, and yet i am still forced to see her in social occasions. i feel like i never really got the chance to tell her how much she means to me and how much i still love her. yet, everytime i see her, the good...
2.
I have no idea how to feel about the whole situation because the truth is that I do care about you still, a lot, but I know that I can’t go back because too much has changed. I’ve been in love with people and I don’t know if I felt it with you but I know there was something and I truly am sorry for everything I’ve put you through. I hope that you have luck finding a place...
1. Dear boy,
I like you so much. I know you like me too, but I want more. I want you to feel completely comfortable with me. To be able to confide in me. I just want to be able to say that you are mine, all mine. Love love love.